You never know, but one day you might get caught skating behind enemy lines at that sick bank to wall spot round the back of President Mugabe’s house, and suddenly you’ll need to dive for cover in some nearby bushes to avoid the gunfire. Hiding is no good without camouflage, as they’ll see your little face poking out between the branches.
Lucky for you, you got yourself this new Death Skateboard deck just the other day and it has a full camo print on the bottom, perfect for hiding your head behind. At 8.125”, there’s plenty of room to cover even the fattest of faces. The only slight problem is the massive white Death logo and Benson’s name underneath, these white marks may give your position away.
Should this happen and you need to make a quick escape, dashing for your helicopter pick-up point, you’ll be pleased to know that this board’s width gives you a lot of control and manoeuvrability to weave in and out of tracer fire. Any obstacles that block your path, there’s more than enough pop to get over fallen trees, trip-wires and landmines. Maybe even chuck a cheeky kickflip in there, deflecting a few bullets with the underside along the way.
Confronted with armed guards, you’ve got a couple of options with this deck. Either go a bit tech and knock out a tre flip, giving them the worst shinners they’ve ever experienced. Or go for the gnarly option, rag it as fast as possible and bodyjar those fools in the head. Both methods would be no problem for this fine piece of wood.
You’ve nearly made it to the rendezvous point, but there’s one final problem. The bridge up ahead has been taken out and your only option is to frontside lipslide the remaining rails. This is where the slow motion mega-action ‘I am Rambo’ bit happens, your war-torn board becoming another film icon as you slide down that rail, John Woo explosions going off in the background, landing and popping your board into your hand as you commando roll into the chopper.
So, in short, this Death Benson board will suit you down to the ground should you ever find yourself on the frontline of a jungle conflict, or if you’re just hacking it round your local concrete jungle.
Moose
When we visited 
If just one look at this tee doesn’t make your mind scream ‘THAT… is the best t-shirt I’ve seen in my entire life’ then I don’t think I can trust you. It’s not often that a photograph can capture something so perfect that no response can be accused of being hyperbole but here is an example. Printed on this 
Pigeons are my favourite animal ever. They’ve got a bad reputation and I dig that. This rep stems from the same breed of idiots that attribute notions of purity and peace to those butter-wouldn’t-melt bastard doves. Despite the dove and the pigeon being in the same family of birds, they are dismissed as a disease-riddled nuisance. Never to be put down by racial profiling, the pigeon is so bad-ass it just struts around cities where ever it pleases, eating up whatever we’re too lazy to put in a bin. The pigeon is an urban bird that quite obviously doesn’t give a fuck. And I love them.
Skateboarders are skateboarders and pedestrians are pedestrians and never the twain shall meet. Now, for the benefit of the pedestrian’s ankles I would testify that this grossly re-contextualised Rudyard Kipling argument is probably for the best. But exclusivity outside of whose ankles your board is smashing into isn’t necessarily as cool as you’d like it to be. 
There are certain things in life that we take for granted. Things that, if taken away from us, would gently sap the joy from our souls, the very part of you that you don’t always notice, but subconsciously makes you want to get up in the morning and fucking get some. I’m talking about the stuff we label as simple things, because they’re simply too overwhelming for us to understand. Like weights being lifted from your chest after just one sip of coffee, the chance of seeing a cat in the street, a good drum beat, the sound of a football commentator losing his shit when his country score and what I got up for this morning – the feeling of skating downhill with brand new wheels.
It’s no secret that 
Getting excited about reissues really shows one’s age, but the truth of matter is, anything that gets another shelf life opportunity usually means it was the dog’s testicles the first time round and therefore deserves this well overdue encore!