Category: Film Reviews

Momentum Pictures

From the producers of Kiss Kiss Bang Bang and directed by Gerry Lively comes Body Armour, a film featuring Til Schweiger and Chazz Palminteri. A bad judgment call three years previously caused the death of not only the presidential candidate John Ridley was employed to bodyguard, but also his career. When approached with a new job the ex-bodyguard snaps it up, but it is not all peaches and cream. Can he put all his emotions and revenge aside to protect the individual that he despises most in the world, the person that shattered his life into shell sized piece and ruined his career?

There is no room emotion and personal feelings when it comes to getting back in the game for this job. Ridley (Schweiger) somehow shows very little emotion whatsoever even when fronted by a person who shoot him and wrecked what seemed like the ideal life. I would have expected a little more than a few punches, a roll over the table and a smirk of disgust on Schweiger part. Palminteri is the perfect person to portray Lee Maxwell, the object of the disgust and the villain trying to make good before his death. At first and throughout much of the movie he is annoying, egotistical and sarcastic, giving a sick to the stomach impression for not only Ridley, but also the viewer.

I like the idea of getting your most hated opponent to protect you. As Palminteri’s character puts it “who better to guard me than the man that want to kill me the most.” It was pretty obvious that Ridley was going to get his job done, if not to protect Maxwell but to kill him after the trial himself. The ending was quite unexpected however. I thought maybe Ridley would see Maxwell was remorseful for his actions and past crimes and let him die peacefully with his condition, never did I expect the true outcome.

Body Armour is classed as an action flick, but where are they hiding it all as there is only minimal present here. In regards to fight scenes, a couple of knocks to the face and a twisted arm are as much as it can scrape up, though the rhythmic scenes show much talent and practice. There is gunfire, but it doesn’t have the same impact as some of the more excitable films released in recent months. There are very little explosions or manic scenes, which keep you on the edge of your seat. You get the odd moment of suspension build up though the music here, but the film pretty much flows without making the heart skip a beat.

Body Armour isn’t nail biting or explosive but there are definitely moments that will surprise you. It may not be the best action flick I have seen, but worth a watch anyway.

Michelle Moore

www.blindness-themovie.com

Blindness is a dramatic thriller film adaptation of the 1995 novel of the same name by José Saramago.

The film opens with a man in his car on a busy motorway who all of a sudden loses his sight. What begins with the condition of one man seeking help with a sight problem, gradually becomes an epidemic where all those that come into contact with someone with the condition also get infected and loses their sight. The infected are transferred to a secure location which gradually becomes overwhelmingly populated and as you can imagine, things do not end happily with rationing of food becoming a problem and one ward deciding they should have more food than another. There are some shocking images present within this focal point of the film.

One ward holds those that had the first cases of the blindness and with the help of the wife of an ophthalmologist who pretends to be blind to stay with her husband, gradually work together to battle the difficulties and struggles they face. Being the only sighted person in the location she cares for, cleans up after and looks out for others in her surroundings, which with everyone urinating and making a complete mess puts a real strain on her relationship with her husband. Julianne Moore must have had such determination and strength to take on this character. We are left with a few questions though regarding her character. The most significant being why was she never infected with the condition?

The way the film is presented is very much like a two part TV series. It looks in detail at all smaller points rather than just glassing over the non-significant areas like most feature films do to get to the more interesting and focal points. The dinner scene towards the end and the fight for food or bathing for example are looked at in great detail when they could have easily be glanced over or missed out completely and would have no lesser impact. Blindness also focuses more on the relationship inside the holding cells than finding a cure at what caused thousands of people to go blind in the beginning. It focuses on dealing with the problems and struggles created by going blind rather than dealing with finding a solution before it happens. We rarely see anyone attempting to create a cure or even find out what caused it in the beginning.

The only real difficulty I had regarding Blindness was its lack of timescale. Whether all the events take place within a week or two or a few months is unclear and I feel I would have had more appreciation for the film if this information had been unveiled. Other than that Blindness was very insightful and made me realise two things; one, people would do anything to survive and two, you can adapt to any situation that comes your way.

Michelle Moore

www.theunbornmovie.co.uk
Universal Pictures

Being classed in the supernatural horror genre and given a 15 certificate made me doubt the capability The Unborn would have on terrifying, shocking and grasping the attention of a viewer with its visuals and story. After watching the trailer, it seemed as though much of the story line and many of the shocking areas were unveiled so what else could the film have in store?

As the trailer explains, Casey (Odette Yustman) is a young woman who begins to experience inexplicable things in her life, beginning with a strange dream and ending with an exorcism. After a night of babysitting turns out quite disturbing, Casey begins to exhibit the heterochromia, a condition where the iris in each of the eyes are two different colours. She is told this usually occurs in twins, which she never knew she was until this point. It is the death of this unborn twin that creates the driving point for the film. As the story continues, Casey is pulled into a world of nightmares as she is haunted by visions of a young boy with piercing blue eyes.

After some research into her visions, and the death of her mother, Casey begins to understand what she is experiencing; this is something vital to understanding the film and something the trailer doesn’t give away, and nor will I. As the movie concludes, Casey begins to wonder why after all these years her twin has chosen this point in her life to return, and this is a closing point for the film.

I absolutely adore all things freaky, the more they are shocking and make a viewer jump the more enjoyable and satisfying they are. Writer/director David Goyer uses some terrifying visual images to give viewers a glimpse into the supernatural, which are astonishing for a film with such a certificate. Visions of demons dogs, a twisted (literally) old man, a very decayed mother and a boy with bright blue eyes that could pierce the heart of anyone jumping at you left right and centre are just some of the startling points; there are many more that the trailer has not uncovered. Within the opening dream sequence for example, I was unprepared for what was coming and jumped out of my skin. Sometimes it is the small and unexpected things that give you the creeps and make you wish you were not sitting on the end of the back row in the cinema.

Some people believe that mirrors are portals to another world, and at some points through The Unborn this seems to have some truth. However, the movie poster showing a half naked Casey looking into the mirror with the vision of a young boy looking back at her reflection was not needed to promote the film. The story line and images alone have the depth to do this themselves.

Gary Oldman plays Rabbi Joseph Sendak within this film, someone who may disbelieve the accounts he hears from Casey as well as his own eyes, but offers his help in exorcising the spirit who is focusing on tormenting her. Ethan Cutkosky makes his film debut and does a remarkable attempt at scaring the life out of everyone with his antagonistic manner and sharp blue eyes, while Yustman puts across her terrified and determined status well.

Cast, plot as well as cinematography is all bang on in making The Unborn one of the most startling and freakishly enjoyable films I have seen in a while.

Michelle Moore

Paramount Pictures
www.fridaythe13thmovie.com

For all the horror fanatics out there, you are probably familiar with the story of Jason Voorhees and the Friday the 13th franchise. For those of you that are not, I am asking myself why?

The original 1980 Friday the 13th will remain as one of the most violent and horrific horror films I have ever seen. It made a statement and included content other horror films have since attempted to stand up to with very few able to achieve this. As well as the violence it had the occasional sex scene/nudity that was unnecessary, but now present in many horror films. These are aspects now predictable and we have come to expect, yet still make for an interesting film. What worked for the first in the franchise, works just as well in this instalment.

I was excited yet apprehensive when I heard Halloween was being remade. Rob Zombie’s outcome was horrendous and completely changed the entire foundations made over the franchise. Many believed Friday the 13th (2009) to be a remake of Friday the 13th (1980), which is in fact incorrect. The location for both may be Camp Crystal Lake, where a young Jason Voorhees drowned due to the camp counsellors being “busy”, but the stories follow on from each other rather than the newer version attempting to retell the same narrative. Much like Halloween: H2O continued twenty years after the original, Friday the 13th (2009) opens with the death of Jason’s mother, before taking on a whole new set of characters and murder scenes.

This renewed version spreads terror through the viewers building of suspense and anticipation creating a few jumps and shocks rather than the actual visions of murders, as these seem to have lost momentum and lack in their shocking scares. There are very few creative killing scenes such as in the opening sequence, the rest lack in terror. The way three separate narrative lines gradually build into one story is what captures the eye and gets a viewer pondering over the open ending.

There is the likeness that you are unfamiliar with the majority of the cast here. The only person I recognised was Jared Padalecki as I had seen him in Supernatural. This doesn’t affect your response to the film; in fact it probably makes the film more accepting not knowing previous films the cast have stared in.

With Friday the 13th (2009) Marcus Nispel hasn’t lost the original status created back in 1980, but added to the franchise creatively and effectively, leaving space for a future enterprise; hopefully with a little more aggression as the first film offered.

Michelle Moore

Fox
www.foxsearchlight.com/notorious

A life chronicalling the life and death of arguably the greatest rapper of all time isn’t an easy task to take on. Not only do you have to present a life that every die hard fan already knows the ins and outs of, but you have to tackle the subjects which plagued the career of the man they called Biggie Smalls and make sure you don’t give a watered down account of it all.

Unfortunately, that is what happens in Notorious. The background is handled well enough, documenting the MC’s descent into drug dealing, stints in prison, lucky escapes from the law, arguments with his mother and becoming a father, but it is when we see Biggie rap that the problems begin to occur. With the man himself being used on the backing track, hearing Woolard rap as Biggie just doesn’t cut it. It might be a small point for the casual viewer, but hearing an ordinary flow instead of the voice that captured my attention and drew me into hip hop in the mid 90s really disappoints.

The main crux of the film happens when Tupac is shot and the East – West rivalry begins. This is the meaty part of the story that really would define whether the film is a hit or not but the outcome is a muddled affair which is explained away by the narration as Tupac being confused. Confused? Really? That makes sense then.

With major incidents like Lil Kim’s abortion being glossed over, it is obvious that Biggie’s mother and former entourage are keen to take the negatives away from him as if to say sure, he lost his temper a few times, but he was a lovely boy. The saccharin ending with the rapper ringing all his former flames to apologise to them just tied the film up as what it was – a Hollywood story.

There are positives in the film – Naturi Naughton’s Lil Kim is absolutely perfect, from looks to delivery of the raps and Puffy’s dancing and Violetta’s “What kind of grown ass man calls himself Puffy?” are genuine laugh-out-loud moments – but they are few and far between. Perhaps I am being overly critical, but when you’re making a film about the life of a man who turned the hip hop world on its head, you have to deliver. This film is bound to do well simply because of the man it portrays but unfortunately for me, it doesn’t present the story nearly as well as it should.

Abjekt.

Lionsgate
www.mybloodyvalentinein3d.com

Jensen Ackles is probably better known as Dean Winchester in Supernatural, and Kerr Smith as Jack McPhee in Dawson’s Creek. Yet even though both these lads became highly known through American Television series’, they have both successfully moved their careers to the big screen, with My Bloody Valentine 3D being the recent release to star both these talented young actors.

The film recalls the beginning of the story where a tragic mining accident causes Tom (Ackles) to become the centre of the town’s attention. A year later, the only survivor of the accident awakes from a coma to seek revenge for what happened. A decade after these events take place, the town of Harmony becomes once again haunted by these events. This back history of what caused the deranged “psycho killer” is not only grasping, but also vital in fully understanding the remainder of the narrative.

Direction from Patrick Lussier is top class when it comes to this film. You are left feeling involved in the story line through 3D imagery, while at the same time at a completely safe distance. Sitting on the edge of your seat and becoming very anxious about the events in store, you are catapulted into the path of an on coming nightmare. Events and killings that would usually shock and on occasions revolt a viewer on the flat screen are bought to life in 3D. Shot guns aimed at the audience, flying bullets past the eye, torches beaming bright and pick axes heading closer than you were hoping for is all to be enjoyed. But an explosion causing blood and rubble to fly at the audience gets the adrenalin rushing a little faster than normal.

If you have seen the trailer you have probably guessed there is a lot of graphic scenes present in My Bloody Valentine, but due to the 3D technology, they are more of an experience than a viewing. Because of this if you suffer from a weak heart, or an uneasy stomach then this may not be a film for you. However, if the thought of eyes gauged from the socket or chests cut open and hearts removed sounds like good viewing, head out now for one of the best horror flicks to be seen in a long time.

I never saw the original My Bloody Valentine released back in 1981. If I had then I may have had a different view on this film and began comparing the two rather than enjoying what the exciting 3D remake had in store. I believe a remake is a way to get a story to a new generation. Some are successful in doing so (Texas Chainsaw Massacre) while others change the story so much it ruins it (Halloween). I was left ecstatic by My Bloody Valentine…will you be?

Michelle Moore

Revolver Entertainment
www.mumanddadthemovie.com

British horror flick Mum and Dad is possibly the most sadistic film I have had to endure watching. The story tells the tale of a polish airport cleaner Lena and her mental hell when she is kidnapped after a late night at work. She thinks she is playing it safe by accepting help from chirpy co-worker Birdie, but is unaware of the family her friend comes from. Lena is catapulted into a sadomasochistic household where torture seems to be the main source of entertainment and pleasure.

Within this perverse family is a couple who insists they be called ‘Mum and Dad‘ and their two “adopted” children, not to mention a skeleton in the closet. Lena has two options while imprisoned in this House of Horrors, become part of the family or fight for her freedom, which is probable going to cause her death.

This is writer/director Steven Sheil‘s first feature film and I’m not sure whether I want to see any more of his work after seeing this. I absolutely love horror flicks, so thinking this one is full of brutality and terror I had high hopes. Firstly, the film takes places in a house near to Heathrow’s runways; pastures way too close for my liking. Secondly, even though this flick may seem well made with creativity in the scenes (a house of torture chambers and prison like bedrooms with some rooms like those present in your grandparent’s house), there is too much revulsion that a viewer must endure; the scenes are gruesome, stomach-churning, shocking and the script is complete filth. Lastly, the narrative is one of disgust and uses this rather than shocking blood scenes to put its storyline across. I do not find sexual acts regarding freshly cut human flesh entertaining in the slightest.

There should be a ‘This Film Contains Scenes Which Some Viewers May Find Disturbing‘ sign at the start of this film so those watching are aware that they may be seeing the return of their last meal. I was left sick to the stomach after watching Mum and Dad. This is the least enjoyable film I have seen, ever!

Michelle Moore

www.thestrangers.net
Rogue Pictures

With the amount of films that are produced and released every year, every so often a number of great films will unfortunately slip beneath the “mainstream” radar. I think The Strangers was one of these films, there was no hype, little publicity and no glowing reviews or “indie” awards which generally guarantee a mass of underground love. But NO! Not here. So I gleefully went along with no expectations or prior knowledge of the films premise. None of my friends had seen it and the handful of reviews I’d skimmed had been vaguely nonchalant.

So the film starts very quietly, we hear an ominous voice over reading some FACTUAL statistics about violent crimes in America, then the dreaded line “based on true events“.. Regardless of this being truthful or not, it still adds to the tension, so good call guys. It cuts to an autumn morning, where two boys find a house that has been forcibly entered, they see splatters of blood on walls and a blood soaked knife; over the visuals we hear a police call, made by a traumatized female.

Cut to a couple (Kirsten and James) driving late at night, arriving at an isolated summer house. There is tension between them and we learn that Kristen had rejected James’ marriage proposal earlier in the evening. Time passes and as they are baring all to each other, get interrupted by a slow, loud knock on the door. It’s a girl asking for someone who doesn’t live there, (or actually just finding out who is home). James then goes out to buy Kirsten some cigarettes, despite being 4am, in the middle of nowhere, with creepy girl loitering in the bushes.

As soon as he leaves we learn the couple are being watched by 3 masked strangers, the tension builds by increments, most of it conveyed through the audio or the lack of, which is perfectly eerie. The sound of the film constantly jars from Joanna Newsom’s beautiful ‘The Sprout and The Bean‘, an ever crackling record player, the sound of muffled breathing and trees quietly moving in a windless night to pure silence.

Every so often it got too tense and I found myself looking around the theater, hoping that everyone else was gripping whatever they could grab with white knuckled hands, sweating profusely into their seat, and thankfully, they were. Unfortunately there are points where you’re shouting at the screen – “Don’t leave her, what are you doing!? Haven’t you ever seen a horror film?! No good can come of this!” Which pisses me off, because come on, if this was based on real events there’s no way you’d do anything on your own, except maybe soil yourself. But apart from these minor cliché ‘horror’ moments, The Strangers is a griping, tense picture, of barbaric, sinister and terrifying violence.

It pushes past the exciting, adrenaline rush of jumpy modern horror films (Scream, Saw etc) and instead focuses on the feeling of complete isolation, despair and impending brutal death. Leaving you feeling so exhausted that you just want them to die already, to get past this massively built hump of inevitable doom. It’s disturbing and incredibly eerie, it will stay with you long after you’ve seen it, and will be impossible to decide if its terrifying in a good way, or, if it’s actually possible, too scary. It’s uncomfortable and relentless but beautifully made and genuinely creepy. I can’t think of a scarier film since I saw Deliverance when I was 14, weeks before a trip to America.

Emily Paget

Twentieth Century Fox
www.takenmovie.co.uk

“I don’t know who you are. I don’t know what you want. If you are looking for a ransom, I can tell you I don’t have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills acquired over a very long career in the shadows that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter do now, that will be the end of it, I will not look for you, I will not peruse you. But if you don’t, I will look for you, I will find you and I will kill you”

I had to open this review with this very shocking, honest and dramatic statement spoken in this film by a father to a kidnapper. Taken tells the story of how Bryan (Liam Neeson), an ex-CIA “Provender”, must travel to Paris and recall all his old skills and contacts to recover his daughter, who has been kidnapped by sex-traffickers; he has 96 hours to find her, or he will lose her forever.

Whether you want to call it a thriller or an action film, Taken has many nail biting moments, some of which increase your suspense when surrounded by the anxious music; I managed to bite though my pen lid while watching. As far as the action scenes go, this film has gunfire, people getting hit by fast moving vehicles, electrocution, fast cars and jumping from a bridge to a boat. The fighting scenes that Neeson is part of make combat look incredibly easy, I guess making the thought and concentration behind the scenes incredibly difficult but defiantly worthwhile. Some of the most shocking moments come in areas of disbelief and if you are startled by sudden noises or motions be warned some will knock you off you seat.

For me, Liam Neeson wasn’t such a big name to have in a film of such momentum. The last flick I probably saw him in was The Haunting. After his strong and authoritative performance as a concerned and worried father/ex-CIA operative, it is definitely a name I will be looking out for in the future; as he is able to carry himself in both regards excellently. It was also great to see Holly Valance back in the lime light, although she doesn’t seem to shy far away from a role she knows all too well, in this case as a pop Diva.

I was very impressed with Taken as there hasn’t been much hype about it, in comparison to Wanted for example. It is an engaging film that you can’t help but stay in tune with. The only real concern that I gathered was the language barrier that was caused. I don’t speak much French and I do no speak any Albanian, so for someone in my situation, when a film has these languages quite regularly, you would expect some sort of translation. There is none unfortunately, except for a small car scene with a translator but that was only because it was written within the films plot. So unless you want to feel excluded and slightly bewildered, as I did when a few viewers surrounding me began laughing at scenes I was lost in dialogue with, I suggest you focus up on your French and enjoy the ride of a life time, comprendre?

Michelle Moore

Sony Pictures

Pinapple Express site

I can’t quite get my head around the reasons this film got such a poor response from the press, especially as it stays very much, along the same lines as previous Apatow productions.

Dale Denton is twenty-something process server who when not thinking of creative ways to serve people their court orders, spends his time getting stoned, or loitering around his 18 year old girlfriend. Dale is en route to FINALLY meet his girlfriends parents, when he witnesses a police officer and established drug lord murder a rival gang lord. So in his haste he runs to his drug dealer, Saul, until he figures that they will be able to trace them because of the uber-exclusive joint of ‘Pineapple Express‘ which Dale dropped at the crime scene.

In their tactless and pot-fogged desperation they make the decision to pay a visit to Saul’s dealer, Red (who, other than Saul was the only person to hold a stash of Pineapple Express). But instead of getting any help from Red, they actually end up dragging him into the situation too. Dale then works out that Angie (his girlfriend) might also be in danger, and so they schlep all the way to Angie’s house, and inadvertently meet her parents, who he then tries to explain the situation to. Dale and Saul are forced to go on the run, where they bond and fight and re-bond and fight and re-bond…etc, etc.

Dale and Saul make an awesomely hilarious duo and you can really tell that there is some genuine chemistry between them. Whilst the film maintains a solid pace, with moments of stomach achingly funny dialogue, and great comic timing, I still feel it’s not as strong or fresh as ‘Knocked Up‘ or ‘The 40 Year Old Virgin‘.

One of the reasons I enjoyed this feature so much was because of the 1980’s action approach they decided to work into it. The soundtrack was perfectly apt with dated but classic tunes from Huey Lewis And The News, Public Enemy and Spiritualized. The excessive violence and wardrobe design also scream eighties fun-times, which amalgamated seems to works brilliantly. All in all, ‘Pineapple Express’ is a laugh out loud, entertaining riot. And without trying to be too offbeat or stupid, comes across as a soon-to-be cult film, a la Cheech and Chong. Wey!

Emily Paget