It is inevitable, that when you are painfully fatigued, let’s say from a routine trip to the local shops (that are far too much of an undesirable walk away to be claimed as ‘local’), that there will be something to stop you in your tracks and serve you up a banquet of bewilderment.
Normally garnished with a sprinkling of ‘what the fuck?’. I kid you not. Next time you feel exhausted, just wait for it, you’re more prone to attack from the beast of confusion than at any other time of the day. I don’t know why. And I certainly still don’t understand the reason for my encounted with monsiuer madness, but, just like I said, it was inevitable.
Literally, a mere few metres from the haven of my kitchen, where I was waiting to unload five remarkably heavy bags of shopping, I was brought to a halt by some raving romanian. “Hey you! Yes, that’s right, you! You with the shopping!” After being blinded by the array of exclamatives, I thought best to entertain his demand and see what he wanted. His first question was,
“Do you know anyone ginger?”
What the jeeping shit do you say to that? No, can’t say that I know a single person who is ginger, sorry. Honestly, some people. Anyway, I inquire as to why, and he continues,
“Ginger. little bit shorter than you. know him? Where can I find him?”
The Grand ol’ Duke of Vague continued with such pathetic descriptions of the mystery ginger, and as the conversation continued, I began to worry what he intended to do upon finding the poor sod. Turns out this romanian fellow was rudely awakened the night before by this enigmatic red head, and he wanted to seek revenge. The guy bore an uncouth resemblence to that shouty fellow in ‘300’, so I felt best to leave as soon as possible. Unfortunately, when I told him that I could be of no assistance, his tone changed dramatically. It’s amazing how much you can tell about someone’s mood from a tiny change of pitch in their voice.
“No. Not good enough. I must find him. Help me. Or else.”
I had to flee from him and his ridiculously short sentences as soon as possible. So I quickly made some excuse about my frozen goods melting and hurried away. As I escaped, he shouted,
“I will keep eye out for you. You have memorable jacket.”
You may wonder why I have decided to tell you about this. Truth is, how much can you say about a piece of material that is designed to keep you warm and as a cheeky bonus make you look fly? Basically, Duffs have made this jacket you can see in the picture above, it’s nice and comfortable, keeps you warm in the harsh british winter, and in my opinion, looks pretty damn fresh. What more else is there to say? If you dig it, go and get it. Just be warned, it apparently stays deep in the mind of vengeful Romanians. Make of this what you will.
Joe Moynihan